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Warning! Contains some early game spoilers from GTA V. Complete up to the first heist before enjoying this!
To any and all politicians running in next year’s election for Governor,
It seems I can’t move anywhere without the local criminal element finding me. I moved here to Los Santos from Liberty City four years ago after reevaluating my life, and things have somehow been worse here. If anyone promises to address the problems I will be listing here, I will support your campaign with my harrowing story for a low, nominal fee (plus a little on top if you are elected). Let’s get started.
They MUST be more restricted!
First, we need to consider putting more restrictions on Ammu-Nation. I’m a red-blooded Republican, but this company has gone too far. There’s no 72-hour waiting period at any of the more than ten locations in the city limits alone. Unsafe. Most of the guns are customizable to a point that military spec ops would find excessive, and even allow for LSPD color schemes to be purchased in store. Why do they get away with that? And why the hell are they licensed to sell a Minigun? Yes, it’s unavailable to most customers and yes, is prohibitively expensive, but it’s on the display wall, so someone’s demand is keeping it in stock…
Why do the alarms not respond to things like this???
But guns aren’t the only problem here. It was bad enough that there were so many criminals in Liberty City, but this town must be training them. I was in a Vangelico in Rockford Hills, trying to purchase an engagement ring when the vents started to spew out chemicals that almost killed me. When I awoke less than ten minutes later, the store had been cleared out, displays smashed and my wallet missing. This was a classy store with an advanced security system! Why did it take so long for the police to respond?
Overpaid and under-worked. Just like Liberty City.
Speaking of police, why are these folks still employed? I mean, I get why police are needed, but these officers need to go back to basic. I downloaded an app on my iFruit phone and not only can I track how far away they are, I can see which way their cars are facing! These are not robots, they’re people. I don’t know how a programmer from Chamberlain Hills can find these things out, let alone why the app is still available on the iFruit store.
An all-too-common sight in Los Santos.
I work at 24/7, a little convenience store, close to my home. This wasn’t the ideal career choice, but times are tough and college apparently “isn’t for me”. Stupid professors. I need to know my life and job are secure, but my store gets robbed so often my bosses are starting to think I’m in on it! Every few hours someone new comes to rob me, and the slow police response, along with the aforementioned iFruit app, seem to keep these criminals coming right back to my store for repeat offenses everyday. Can we not get an officer at the door once in a while? We sell fresh donuts made daily, aren’t cops still eating these things?
The late and the great.
And what’s with quality control of product safety in this city? I plunged half my savings into Lifeinvader’s IPO and was finally making some money in my life and BOOM. Prototype phone blows Jay Norris’ head off. On national television. And I lost so much money I can’t pay off my loan
shar officers what they’re owed.
While we’re on the topic of loan
shar officers, something needs to be done about the the local ocean life. I was swimming in the bay and almost got my leg ripped off. If you think I, or most of the workforce in the state, have health insurance, you are sorely mistaken.
Please take some time to consider my proposal. You could be one “Joe the Plumber” away from being the new governor.
A patriotic citizen who might have your vote!