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Lighter Side of the Sword Coast: The Misadventures of Kalvanis Mantalir Volume IX


“No respect, no respect at all…”

Entry Twenty


Some people! We go on that long drawn out quest to try and avenge his brother’s death, and how does Rassad repay us? He leaves! Sure, he was a bit bummed when he found out his brother was still alive, and had betrayed his Monkly order on Monkitude. And I can see him being even more upset when we were eventually forced to slay his brother in an epic mountain top battle. But to leave us after all that because he “needed to sort out his feelings?” I mean really, some people are totally self involved.

I’m not touching this one.

What one?

Entry Twenty One

Everyone is abandoning me! While in Beregost planning our next excursion north, a man with a lute approached Khalid, and Jaheira, and just like that they told me they were leaving! Sure, Jaheira is a bit prickly, but I’m going to miss Khalid. Luckily later that day we ran into the most wise and strong Minsc! Still traveling with the Dynaheir, they agreed to join our little group. Butt kicking for goodness!

He’s not wise…he talks to his hamster.

His miniature giant space hamster! Wisest of all creatures!

Crudely drawn picture of a woman face palming.


“Don’t teach my hamster to suck eggs!”

Entry Twenty Two

My close, and loyal friend Drizzt was right. Through our efforts in the Northern woods we have battled many of these mercenaries, and a few bore the markings of the Black Talon. One such member under question revealed that the more organized Hobgoblins we’ve been seeing are another company by the name of The Chill. Ridiculous name, I mean really, that’s not intimidating at all. These Hobgoblins need to hire a better bard or something.

As I write this I stare across the fire at another Drow, but I suspect she is not quite as gallant or friendly as Drizzt. We saved her from some Flaming Fists before we knew her nature, but now I fear that was a mistake. Viconia she calls herself, and we should be rid of her as soon as possible. She did mention however that there was a bandit camp nearby, so she may be of some use. Rest assured, I’ll be keeping my eye on that one.

Oh great, I can sleep better at night knowing that.

Why Imoen what a nice thing to say…hey was that sarcasm? Stop writing sarcastic comments in my journal devil woman!

Entry Twenty Three

Success! Nuh-uh!

We have infiltrated the bandit band, and now eagerly gather information, we shall soon bring these bandits to justice!

We were captured you dolt! And why in the gods names were you writing in this after you got your hands free? How “long” were you free before you undid the rest of our bindings anyhow?!

Ahem! Details of our daring battle to come!


About failedwell

Is a semi disgruntled vet who...GET OFF MY LAWN YOU INGRATES!

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