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Lighter Side of the Sword Coast: The Misadventures of Kalvanis Mantalir Volume XI

imagesEntry Twenty Seven

I am truly exhausted after our ordeal in the mines.

Well of course you are you fumbling ninny! We had run out of them before they flooded right after that lead miner said “No wait! Don’t touch that!”

Ahem yes, well. Never mind that, besides if you’re going to write in my journal STOP GIVING AWAY THE EPIC CONCLUSIONS! Well then, now that that is settled and I have found a nice spot away from prying eyes and grabbing fingers, I’ll recount our adventures.

After a harrowing battle, (which I was of course apart of) to enter the mines, things grew ever more grim. The miners themselves were clearly beaten down slaves, and guards lurked around every corner. Several times my companions began to lose heart, but by inspirational songs and fine speeches kept them going. Minsc brave as ever led many a charge into dark hallways, supported by my steel and magic as well as Dynaheir, and Neera’s magics we were able to overcome great odds as we battled deeper into the mines. Oh, I think Imoen was there too.

YeslickA bit further in we met a Dwarf named Yeslick, odd name for sure, but apparently his clan used to own the mines that we had found ourselves in. He agreed to join us and proved a worthy compantion, skilled with the hammer and shield, and priest to some Dwarven god or another to boot! Ah, our group finally feels complete. But I digress.

We fell many an enemy as we made our way to the deepest part of the mine, and too the sanctum of an evil wizard named Daevron. After a long exhausting battle we managed to overcome him, and I had thought our adventure over. But no! We found that Daevron too had a master a man named Reiltar, the head of a merchant company called the Iron Throne. Quite an original name that, I’m sure it wasn’t stolen from somewhere else at all.

Anyway, now we travel to Baldur’s Gate! Odd for some reason it feels like we should have gone there sooner…

May have been there eh? Well why did you leave out the part where I had to get your tow out of the trap why you squealed like an infant? Or how you fainted after Daevron’s first spell and Minsc had to carry you all the way up to the top of the mine? All the while Yeslick was saying that he didn’t understand, he was sure that spell had only been a ward. And not to mention the fact that you flooded the whole mine, and those poor people barely escaped…An—-

That is quite enough!

Note to self: The book is fine, find a way to get rid of Imoen…


About failedwell

Is a semi disgruntled vet who...GET OFF MY LAWN YOU INGRATES!

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